Newgrounds.com — Everything, By Everyone.

Been on the internet for a few years, and I'm only reletively entertained by what I've seen.
This entire post is really just going to be a reference for me to look at when I need entertainment.
You should try it to.

Found these videos a while back, loved them.
http://www.halolz.com/2008/02/24/video -half-life-full-life-consequences/
http://www.halolz.com/2008/03/04/video -half-life-full-life-consequences-2/
http://www.halolz.com/2009/03/09/video -half-life-hero-beggining/
http://www.halolz.com/2009/06/08/video -half-life-full-life-consequences-free -man/#comments
http://www.halolz.com/2008/10/27/video -quarter-life-halfway-to-destruction/

Been playing Oblivion alot, check this shit out.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AaUErLX cH9o

Here are some web comics I enjoy.
http://www.sisterclaire.com/
http://twokindscomic.com/
Keep in mind, that comic above's link may not work in the future, the author is moving the site.
http://www.jaynaylor.com/betterdays/ar chives/2003/04/post-2.html
That comic ended before summer, it has a spin off though.
http://www.jaynaylor.com/originallife/
archives/2009/06/001.html
http://www.lfgcomic.com/
http://www.vgcats.com/comics/?strip_id =271
http://alienlovespredator.com/
http://www.macguff.fr/goomi/unspeakabl e/weblog.html
all of my favorite comics on Smack Jeeves.

I recently joined this site, Which is made of pure awesome.
You should join to.

And some porn.
http://chan.yiffy.tk/

Now, for a life update.
I've started driver's ed, and it's boring.
My damn mother and father barely buy enough food for the whole fucking family any more, and when they do it's shit I dislike. (cereal.)

I hate cereal.
It's gotten to be so repeatative, that I go into fits of rage at the site of yet another bowl of CoCo puffs, or Life. I hate cereal so much.

I'm starting to edge away from NG, all I do here now is blam everything that I see on the flash portal, and blogging is useless, because none of you dipshits ever visit me any more. How do you think that makes me feel, eh? ;__;

This could be my last post for a year, as I'm more entertained elsewere.
In other, more happy news, my Ex and I are getting along, and are now at the stage of "friends that cuddle." Come to think of it, we were always frinds who cuddle.

My mind is becomeing more hightened, wile m body, and my speach become weak, and failuable.
I must read more, to better my dialouge in public.
By that, I mean I can't talk good around people in the real world.
I plan out my conversations, thinking through every detail, schemeing for every possable outcome.
But when it comes time to spill forth my plans, I can no longer sound as a genius.
Just the other day, my friend came over for the 4th to discuss our comic that we have been planning.
When I told her that a character she liked would be killed off, to save the human race, I didn't sound epic, nor did I sound any where near as awesome as I did in my head.
I can't communicate useing speach, and I may have to get one of those awesome sauce keyboards like S. Hawking.

If your reading any of this, you either have no life, or I spammed your profile to get you to look at mine.
Comment if you like, it will only provide both of us with meagor entertainment.

Stay in school, you fucking furfags.

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The People Have Spoken

64 Comments

Jul. 8, 2009 | 12:18 AM Chdonga says:

So long as your sprites aren't recolors, I have respect for you.

Jul. 8, 2009 | 12:32 AM Jesuslizard responds:

Recolors!

PEH!

I splooge on those despicable pieces of refuse and smut!

Jul. 9, 2009 | 3:01 PM ninjaofthepie says:

YOU NEVER VISIT ME ANYMORE!!! D:

Jul. 9, 2009 | 6:20 PM Jesuslizard responds:

To fucking bad.

Jul. 9, 2009 | 8:53 PM ninjaofthepie says:

NO YOU NEVER VISIT MEEEE ANYMORE!!!!!!

Jul. 9, 2009 | 10:13 PM Jesuslizard responds:

NO NO YOU NEVER VISIT MEEEE ANYMORE!!!!!!

Jul. 9, 2009 | 10:21 PM ninjaofthepie says:

NO NO NO U NEVA NO YOU NEVER VISIT MEEEE ANYMORE!!!!!!

Jul. 10, 2009 | 11:17 AM Jesuslizard responds:

Three strikes bitch.

Jul. 10, 2009 | 8:36 PM Rabid-Monkey101 says:

Ninjaofthepie vs. Jesuslizard... Fight!

Jul. 10, 2009 | 9:30 PM Jesuslizard responds:

GET OVER HERE!
FATALITY!

Jul. 10, 2009 | 10:48 PM Rabid-Monkey101 says:

Oh crap?! *Runs*

Jul. 11, 2009 | 12:41 PM Jesuslizard responds:

Run botch.

Jul. 11, 2009 | 6:06 AM Anubis123451 says:

Well sorry to hear that about you bro, I agree newgrounds is a crap dumpster still. If anything email me sometime.

Jul. 11, 2009 | 12:42 PM Jesuslizard responds:

No.

Jul. 18, 2009 | 7:17 PM megamanx736 says:

Jul. 18, 2009 | 7:42 PM Jesuslizard responds:

yiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffy iffy iffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyi ffyi ffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyif fyif fyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiff yiff yiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffy iffy iffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyi ffyi ffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyif fyif fyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiff yiff yiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffy iffy iffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyi ffyi ffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyif fyif fyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiff yiff yiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffy iffy iffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyi ffyi ffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyif fyif fyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiff yiff yiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffy iffy iffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyi ffyi ffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyif fyif fyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiff yiff yiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffy iffy iffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyi ffyi ffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyif fyif fyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiff yiff yiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffy iffy iffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyi ffyi ffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyif fyif fyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiff yiff yiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffy iffy iffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyi ffyi ffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyif fyif fyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiff yiff yiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffy iffy iffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyi ffyi ffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyif fyif fyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiffyiff yiff
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Jul. 21, 2009 | 12:49 PM Cryptomaniac2204 says:

Oh i see, furries are too good for ya huh? Well then I'll take my catgirls and leave lol ^^.

Jul. 21, 2009 | 8:40 PM Jesuslizard responds:

Fuck your cat girls.
I have tentacle slime girls.

Jul. 27, 2009 | 6:49 PM cody316 says:

don't worry. None of us care if you leave or not anyway.

Jul. 27, 2009 | 8:37 PM Jesuslizard responds:

I care nothing for your comment, so I'll just copy paste something here for a reference.

No, you didn't.

First row of morphing is awfuul, don't use the line tool for that sort of thing, custom make a solar flare effect.

Shades go from dark to light back to dark, they should change more evenly.

Seventh spinning pose looks fucked up.

Inverted colors = unoriginal.

No shading or outline on the legs in the row above the sandwich.

Capitalize your i's, you filthy nooblet.

Aug. 1, 2009 | 9:51 PM firemaker60 says:

I swear, if I could set up RSS feeds on newspages...

Anyway, have you read that one fanfic about Gardevoir yet?

Aug. 1, 2009 | 10:01 PM Jesuslizard responds:

LINKME!LINKME!LINKME!LINKME!LINKM E!LINKME!LINKME!LINKME!LINKME!LIN KME!LINKME!LINKME!LINKME!LINKME!L INKME!LINKME!LINKME!LINKME!LINKME !LINKME!LINKME!LINKME!LINKME!LINK ME!LINKME!LINKME!LINKME!LINKME!LI NKME!LINKME!LINKME!LINKME!LINKME!
LINKME!LINKME!LINKME!LINKME!LINKM E!LINKME!LINKME!LINKME!LINKME!LIN KME!LINKME!LINKME!LINKME!LINKME!L INKME!LINKME!LINKME!LINKME!LINKME !LINKME!LINKME!LINKME!LINKME!LINK ME!LINKME!LINKME!LINKME!LINKME!LI NKME!LINKME!LINKME!LINKME!LINKME!
LINKME!LINKME!LINKME!LINKME!LINKM E!LINKME!LINKME!LINKME!LINKME!LIN KME!LINKME!LINKME!LINKME!LINKME!

Aug. 12, 2009 | 11:25 PM leob123 says:

quite interesting what what
p.-

Aug. 13, 2009 | 4:54 PM Jesuslizard responds:

Indeed, good chappy.

P3T

Aug. 13, 2009 | 11:24 PM sonicpokemon says:

Cool story bro. Mine is cooler.

Aug. 14, 2009 | 4:48 PM Jesuslizard responds:

What is this? I don't even

Updated: Aug. 14, 2009, 4:48 PM

Aug. 17, 2009 | 11:54 AM amonkeyonfire says:

tryed talking to your self out loud in a mirror? works for the sims...wait your family buys cereal for you to eat...you mean just for the mornings right? O.o

random fact you dont really give a fuck about: did you know the hawking has been offered a better more faster speach computer thing? but he turned it down due to that fact that its who he is and its sorta "his voice"

Aug. 17, 2009 | 6:13 PM Jesuslizard responds:

Wow.
Random fact, cuttlefish are the only known cephalopod to hump.
Random fact, foxes cum as much as they pee.
Random fact, The bannanas we eat are not real bananas. Real bananas are ugly midgits bananas.
Random fact, wild strawberries are poisonous.

Aug. 26, 2009 | 8:49 PM Cericon says:

It seems like spam only works one way, eh?

Aug. 26, 2009 | 9:32 PM Jesuslizard responds:

Agreed.
Grow up kid.
Next strike, I'm reporting you.

Aug. 26, 2009 | 9:33 PM Cericon says:

For what? Spamming your profile?
A mod could only do something if it happened on the forums, and I don't one of the admins would come to your defense over some trivial shit like this.

Also, you fucking started it.

Aug. 26, 2009 | 9:42 PM Jesuslizard responds:

I started it in the sense of joking around.

You took it a step further, instead of just laughing along with everyone else, you had to proove yu were better than me.
Which you didn't.
If any thing, you damned your already tedious reputation.

Aug. 26, 2009 | 9:39 PM Cericon says:

Also, "kid"?
Talk about unwarranted self important.

Aug. 26, 2009 | 9:44 PM Jesuslizard responds:

Kid.
Your around 13 or so.
Not fully grown.
Not mature.
You don't even act mature.
Your nothing.
Go make fun of a furfag who will react in a funny way.
If I can make a suggestion~
http://sonicpokemon.newgrounds.co m/

Aug. 26, 2009 | 9:55 PM Cericon says:

13? You don't even have your age registered here, so I'd kindly shut the fuck up if I were you.

I don't need to prove that I'm better than a furfag.

Joking around? Bullshit, you wanted a picture of her with a dick, and was desperate to get it.

You're pretty butthurt about this, eh?

Also, it's "You're nothing."
You're a discredit to furrys, and that's really saying something.

Aug. 26, 2009 | 10:06 PM Jesuslizard responds:

Are you trying to proove a point?
You logic is so full of holes, I could spend my whole life trying to stick my dick in all of them, and I'd die before I even got half way.

Come back when you can hold an argument.
You will know when that is, because your posts will all look retarded.
Have a nice day.

Aug. 26, 2009 | 10:51 PM firemaker60 says:

Hey, hey, Cericon, no need to argue here. We're all among equals.

It'll be better in the long run if the two of you become friends, rather than being bitter enemies and battling each other over posts on the internet. So, how about a truce?

Aug. 27, 2009 | 6:52 PM Jesuslizard responds:

I can't become friends with someone who has his head jammed up his ass.

Aug. 30, 2009 | 2:07 PM Srvalyst says:

This is quite amusing if you ask me. Cericunt! mah boi!

Aug. 30, 2009 | 5:02 PM Jesuslizard responds:

BOMBS?
ROPE?
LAMP OIL!
YOU WANT IT, IT'S YOURS, MY FRIEND.
AS LONG HAS YOU HAVE THE RUPIES!

Sep. 2, 2009 | 6:32 PM CapnCrunchDaPimp says:

Oh wow, an actually clever Rick Roll. And I actually fell for it. Well done sir. There's also nothing wrong with being a cuddle slut. :)

Sep. 2, 2009 | 6:47 PM Jesuslizard responds:

I know.
That's why I like it. <3

Sep. 2, 2009 | 6:53 PM thelittleemo says:

I've been reading twokinds for a while, it's a pretty nice comic. I just hate that it takes a week to update D:

But I'm jealous of you, getting coco puffs, I never get that kind of cereal. Just the bland old fruit loops. But I usually mix it up by waking up early and making my own breakfast. Of course I learned that I can't make eggs at all.

And I oddly had the same problem when I talked to people, it was odd. Of course then I just stopped planning what I would say at just talked. It's odd to explain it really.

And fuck chan.yiff, they always just repost the same things over and over. It's gotten where I see the same pictures in different threads.

Sep. 2, 2009 | 7:01 PM Jesuslizard responds:

It is a good comic.

They put up a thingy to stop double posts some time ago.
Don't think it worked though. ;__;

Sep. 2, 2009 | 9:39 PM ChocEliteBar says:

Panty pics nao.

Also what the fuck, cereal? Holy shit that's fucking stupid. Sucks. You should grab some money and buy some ground beef, cook yourself some burgers. And learn how while you're at it.

Sep. 2, 2009 | 9:45 PM Jesuslizard responds:

My dietary supliments are my own to decide.

I choose to eat your mother.

Sep. 4, 2009 | 2:50 PM memea says:

all you do is call ppl fags lol

Sep. 4, 2009 | 4:36 PM Jesuslizard responds:

All you do is state the obvious. Fag.

Sep. 5, 2009 | 12:50 PM ChocEliteBar says:

Wait I forgot to ask something:

YOU HAVE TITS?!?! :O

Sep. 5, 2009 | 9:38 PM Jesuslizard responds:

...

OH MY GOD!
I don't!
My life is a lie!

Sep. 5, 2009 | 3:31 PM memea says:

go and find your gay partner.

Sep. 5, 2009 | 9:39 PM Jesuslizard responds:

But I already found you...

Sep. 8, 2009 | 11:24 AM Howsyourknee says:

nmmmm interesting lol lulz

Sep. 8, 2009 | 4:44 PM Jesuslizard responds:

Fuck you.

Sep. 9, 2009 | 2:06 PM KuroiYasha says:

I see some nice art. 'Baloons' are cool, I think.
Yes, I read this, I have no life.

Sep. 9, 2009 | 5:11 PM Jesuslizard responds:

Lol.
Good to see that your still alive, I missed your quirky attitude.

Sep. 10, 2009 | 11:41 AM andross64 says:

wazzzzup

Sep. 10, 2009 | 5:07 PM Jesuslizard responds:

WALBLAZZZUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUP!?

Sep. 10, 2009 | 1:35 PM KuroiYasha says:

Alive, ha! Yeah, I'm still living my shitty life. What about you, sir Lovecraft lover? How's your life going?

Sep. 10, 2009 | 5:07 PM Jesuslizard responds:

As bad as yours, no doubt about it.

Sep. 18, 2009 | 3:35 AM flipout6655 says:

Shit, I haven't been to see you in ages.

Love your art smacked on the art portal here. Sweet stuff.

Sep. 18, 2009 | 4:38 PM Jesuslizard responds:

Comment on it then, why don't you.

Sep. 22, 2009 | 10:32 AM amonkeyonfire says:

well why dont you just not talk? or just look cool! then nobody will care what you sound like! one tip shades i allways carry shades around on me infact if you go through my post's thses a picture of me with them on my cap...

Sep. 22, 2009 | 4:46 PM Jesuslizard responds:

If your grammar and spelling are that bad in real life, I highly doubt your considered "cool".

Besides, cool kids are black, they drop their pants low and call it "saggin", they do lots of drugs, beat other kids up, and rape girls.
That's what cool is.
Bitch, you ain't cool.

Oct. 8, 2009 | 1:20 AM chillbro says:

Tonight there's gonna be a jailbreak
Somewhere in this town
See me and the boys we don't like it
So were getting up and going down

Hiding low looking right to left
If you see us coming I think it's best
To move away do you hear what I say
From under my breath

Tonight there's gonna be a jailbreak
Somewhere in the town
Tonight there's gonna be a jailbreak
So don't you be around

Don't you be around

Tonight there's gonna be trouble
Some of us won't survive
See the boys and me we mean business
Bustin' out dead or alive

I can hear the hound dogs on my trail
All hell breaks loose, alarm and sirens wail
Like the game if you lose
Go to jail

Tonight there's gonna be a jailbreak
Somewhere in the town
Tonight there's gonna be a jailbreak
So don't you be around

Tonight there's gonna be trouble
I'm gonna find myself in
Tonight there's gonna be trouble
So woman you stay with a friend

You know it's safer

Breakout!

Tonight there's gonna be a breakout
Into the city zones
Don't you dare to try and stop us
No one could for long
I can see the Searchlight on my trail
Tonight's the night all systems fail
Hey you good lookin' female
Come here!

Tonight there's gonna be a jailbreak
Somewhere in the town
Tonight there's gonna be a jailbreak
So don't you be around

Tonight there's gonna be trouble
I'm gonna find myself in
Tonight there's gonna be trouble
So woman you stay with a friend

Oct. 8, 2009 | 4:55 PM Jesuslizard responds:

FUCK YEAH, CRACKA!

Updated: Oct. 8, 2009, 4:55 PM

Oct. 8, 2009 | 7:11 PM Toiletpaper says:

Posted: "July 7th"
..............
Woo.

Oct. 8, 2009 | 7:40 PM Jesuslizard responds:

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Oct. 8, 2009 | 9:01 PM The-word-destroyer says:

No you're a fag my friend. get a life. x.x

Oct. 9, 2009 | 8:33 PM Jesuslizard responds:

I THOUGHT WE WERE FRIENDS!

Oct. 8, 2009 | 9:35 PM Toiletpaper says:

GET ON THE BBS MOAR.

Oct. 9, 2009 | 8:33 PM Jesuslizard responds:

MAYBE I WILL.

Oct. 10, 2009 | 2:26 AM st91 says:

suck cumming dick you nasty whore bitch

Oct. 11, 2009 | 12:05 AM Jesuslizard responds:

That would really hit the spot right now.

Oct. 10, 2009 | 12:16 PM amonkeyonfire says:

i am cool....ok maybe not top of the food chain but i know how to win a fight. i even won one where the asshole pulled out a nife. i grab his arm so he couldnt use it and head butted him right in the nose...even better everyone called him a coward for pulling it out in a fair fight that he started...

Oct. 11, 2009 | 12:05 AM Jesuslizard responds:

You can't impress me over the internet.
Stop trying, faggot.

Oct. 11, 2009 | 1:42 AM CapnCrunchDaPimp says:

Fucking Rickroll. I'm going to murder your tits, I swear. If you're so bored of cereal, try Cap'n Crunch, it's an orgasm in your mouth. Driver's Ed is horribly boring but worth the time, trust me. Also, Hey There Chtulu? I lol'd.

Oct. 11, 2009 | 2:26 PM Jesuslizard responds:

Boy, you got here right on time!
This TOTTALY isn't an old ass post that should have noticed earlier!

Oct. 11, 2009 | 8:50 PM ScaryMovieDude says:

Ahahahhaha Wass Up Homie AAAAAAHhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!! Jizzed In Ma Pants

Oct. 12, 2009 | 4:40 PM Jesuslizard responds:

I haven't seen you since GOD HAD A RAKE BABY.

Oct. 12, 2009 | 6:50 PM ScaryMovieDude says:

I'm Gonna Bang You Ah Yeah Baby Mmmmmmmmmmm!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Oct. 12, 2009 | 6:53 PM Jesuslizard responds:

ALL OVER MY FACE, YEAH, BITCH!

Oct. 12, 2009 | 7:18 PM ScaryMovieDude says:

Please I'm Sorry I Didn't Mean it

Oct. 12, 2009 | 8:35 PM Jesuslizard responds:

Oh, I can't stay mad at you!

Oct. 12, 2009 | 7:23 PM ScaryMovieDude says:

Now Swallow My Cum And Suck My Dick Harder!!!!!!!!!!!!

Oct. 12, 2009 | 8:36 PM Jesuslizard responds:

Give me a blister pack of Tyranids and I'll do more than just that. ;3

Oct. 12, 2009 | 9:55 PM ScaryMovieDude says:

Okay How Much Do they Cost?!

Oct. 14, 2009 | 10:10 AM Jesuslizard responds:

one blister pack is $40 bucks, faggot.

Oct. 12, 2009 | 10:03 PM StrangelyMauled says:

Your art is interesting. Good, but interesting.

Oct. 14, 2009 | 10:11 AM Jesuslizard responds:

Then COMMENT on it.
I don't want to know what you think, unless your telling me what you think about it.
Fuck, man.

Oct. 21, 2009 | 1:20 AM st91 says:

fakrwawr

Oct. 21, 2009 | 4:36 PM Jesuslizard responds:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bL O7IxKwruc&feature=fvw

Oct. 22, 2009 | 5:34 PM Viper90 says:

http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Furr y

Oct. 22, 2009 | 8:13 PM Jesuslizard responds:

Seen it.
Love it.

Oct. 25, 2009 | 4:32 AM darkmaster962000 says:

"If your reading any of this, you either have no life, or I spammed your profile to get you to look at mine."

To be honest, I only came here because of your forum signature, hoping to find the original picture somewhere in your blog.

...But I didn't feel like clicking through 28 blog posts, so I decided to post here, and only now do I realize that I could just ask you for the original picture.

Yes.

Oct. 25, 2009 | 11:51 AM Jesuslizard responds:

See that link up in the blog that says "porn"?
Click it and all of your wildest furry dreams will come true.

Oct. 30, 2009 | 12:04 AM ngfan14 says:

I think you should stay in school, furfag. <3

Oct. 30, 2009 | 4:32 PM Jesuslizard responds:

It's cold, he thinks, as he washes up in the sink.

Oct. 30, 2009 | 2:06 PM The-word-destroyer says:

Yes twas a horrible date i agree. I wish you with luck on you're dating life haha

Oct. 30, 2009 | 4:34 PM Jesuslizard responds:

As the spiders go bananas, he slips in to his new pajamas and waits to be king

Oct. 31, 2009 | 7:21 PM ngfan14 says:

You seem like a poet. I too know some poetry. But I will not share it with you.

Nov. 1, 2009 | 11:08 PM Jesuslizard responds:

Oh, soothe, for though art a fiendish and vile being for not disclosing your poetry and prose.
Thy shall be visited by mine squid on this moon!

Nov. 2, 2009 | 10:29 AM ngfan14 says:

Oh, thou art very wise and witty
Yet thy poetry is full of lies and shitty

Nov. 2, 2009 | 10:59 PM Jesuslizard responds:

Lies, lies, I dismiss thy prose.
You can take this bile and suck my hose!

Nov. 2, 2009 | 11:07 PM ngfan14 says:

You are a great poet. I give in. You are the victor. You have my permission to marry my 7 year old daughter.

Nov. 2, 2009 | 11:16 PM Jesuslizard responds:

Now that's more like it!
I'll give you my two pigs in exchange, as a peace thing.

Nov. 5, 2009 | 3:32 PM bobrey456 says:

I'm gonna rape your soul while using Extenze®.

P.S. Birthday in 2 daze

Nov. 5, 2009 | 11:26 PM Jesuslizard responds:

I care about your birthday.

Nov. 5, 2009 | 8:08 PM Suffering says:

you sure are edgy and hardcore

Nov. 5, 2009 | 11:26 PM Jesuslizard responds:

You sure are angsty and irritating to be around

Nov. 5, 2009 | 10:18 PM ngfan14 says:

They better be fat, healthy pigs. D:

Nov. 5, 2009 | 11:27 PM Jesuslizard responds:

Midgit fat healthy pigs.
Perfect for vore.

Nov. 7, 2009 | 12:30 AM darkmaster962000 says:

Altoids could totally beat giant millipedes in a fight, no argument whatsoever.

Nov. 7, 2009 | 12:43 PM Jesuslizard responds:

Yeah, but what if there was a centipede helping the millipede?

Nov. 7, 2009 | 11:10 AM bobrey456 says:

IT'S MAH 13TH BIRTHDAYZ!!

Nov. 7, 2009 | 12:43 PM Jesuslizard responds:

Woo hoo

Nov. 8, 2009 | 3:49 PM bobrey456 says:

Sir,

I believe your testicles are in my coffee.
Can you please remove them?

Nov. 9, 2009 | 9:20 PM Jesuslizard responds:

You bloody wanker, what the hell are you staring at thme for if you want them out?

Nov. 9, 2009 | 7:04 PM Itsbroken2 says:

Okay I shall, desu.

Nov. 9, 2009 | 9:22 PM Jesuslizard responds:

You better.
I'll french toast you quite severely if you do not!

Nov. 17, 2009 | 7:34 PM manicjudgement says:

I may travel in different, less optimistic circles than Jonathan Margolis does, but when I "look around the world," I do not see "a civilization living and breathing orgasmic longing, orgasmic tension and orgasmic release." I do not see "billions of people ... desperate to have orgasms like the ones they read about all the time." As pleasurable as orgasm is, I am skeptical that much crime in the Western world is caused by men having inadequate ones or that "much of the raw violence in fundamentalist societies must stem from male sexual frustration." (The problem seems to be that men have shortsightedly deprived themselves of "the joy of shared orgasmic pleasure" by oppressing women.) When all this is sorted out-and Margolis assures us it will be soon -"women in the Third World and fundamentalist regimes will begin ... to make progress towards getting their share of pleasure from sex," and "the world will become a calmer, better place." It is hard to take this seriously.

"Fascinatingly, in preliterate cultures around the world where the sex/babies connection is unknown or misunderstood, women, sole suppliers of the delicious snack for the sensation known as orgasm," have, Margolis assures us, "more power than in better informed societies." Really? In fact, it is not clear that any such society exists; women are not monopoly "suppliers" anywhere. (As Margolis himself points out relentlessly, masturbation is universally available-free-as are same-sex sources of "the delicious snack.") Insofar as women have more power in hunter-gatherer societies, it is because they have a larger share in providing day-to-day sustenance, not orgasms.

He seems to think that sex is "natural," that morality, religion, and politics just screw things up. Neolithic man at the dawn of civilization got it right, and it has been downhill all the rest of the way. But then Margolis tells us about the modern day Mangaian boys of the South Pacific-untouched, it seems, by all the restraints of civilization-who go through elaborate training in cunnilingus and breast sucking and are "taught always to bring their partner to orgasm several times" before having one of their own. So much for just letting nature take her course.

Nov. 17, 2009 | 7:49 PM Jesuslizard responds:

I almost cracked a smile.

Oh, wait, no I didn't.

Nov. 19, 2009 | 9:25 PM manicjudgement says:

Yay! My spam caused you to smile!

(You did mean the "No I didn't" to apply on the "almost", right?)

Nov. 22, 2009 | 12:04 AM notanerd2 says:

The one who failed my test. We meet again.

Nov. 26, 2009 | 1:03 AM LTmatt says:

hey furfaggot, remember me?

Nov. 26, 2009 | 11:48 AM Jesuslizard responds:

Almost.